The Hollywood Commandments Read online

  •Take care of the gatekeepers. I mentioned this before but it’s worth repeating. Take care of and pay respect to the people who make the machine run: assistants, receptionists, secretaries, appointment bookers. They’re the people who provide that most valuable of commodities: access. Gatekeepers control the time and calendars of the most powerful people in every industry, so if you want to get to the man or woman in the corner office, you have to go through their assistant. These people work hard, and they tend to be terribly unappreciated, so be the person who appreciates them. Be kind, compliment their work, and send thank-you notes, things like that. Treat them with the respect they deserve.

  •Know when it’s time to end your term of service. I’ve counseled you to focus on service for its own sake, and that’s still my advice. However, service is not a blank check. You are carrying that other person’s crown for a reason: because it’s key to your advancement. But if you’re in that position long enough, there will come a time when you’ve learned everything you can at that level and need to move up or move on. After you’ve put in the work and earned your keep, it’s okay to be clear and honest: you’d like a new opportunity. If one isn’t forthcoming, or if you’re told to wait indefinitely, declare that term of service over. Don’t worry about it, but know when that moment has arrived and what you’ll do next.

  •If things aren’t working out, ask how you can be of better service. If your career feels stalled and stagnant, don’t panic. But also, don’t go sending out a thousand resumes or spending a fortune on grad school, not just yet. Instead, ask those you work with and for a simple question: “How can I be of better service?” Remember, it’s the quality of your service that creates your value, and when you create value, you get valuable opportunities in return. Be open to honest feedback on the quality of your service and bury your ego when it comes to making the necessary adjustments to do a better job.

  When we learn to carry other people’s crowns, we are doing what God has called us to do—live lives of service. What’s more, we are putting ourselves in valuable positions to learn, study, and grow into the roles we want to be taking on someday.

  THOU SHALT

  »Take joy in serving all people well.

  »Ask questions. A position of service is an incredible classroom.

  »Be patient.

  »Look for the seam.

  THOU SHALT NOT

  »Feel entitled.

  »Let service in your career interfere with service in your community or vice versa.

  »Forget that by serving man, you put yourself in a position to better serve God.

  4

  YOU HAVE TO KNOW THE RULES TO PLAY THE GAME

  It is a good idea to obey all the rules when you’re young just so you’ll have the strength to break them when you’re old.

  —Mark Twain

  If you don’t understand how your business operates, the politics and the dynamics of recognition, what success means, and who has the power, you are at a distinct disadvantage. That’s one of the rules of every profession, and that’s what this chapter is about. Thinking again about Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, we see they had to learn the rules just like anyone else. Babylon was a system, Hollywood is a system, and whatever industry you are aspiring to succeed in is a system as well. The strategy for success the Hebrew boys discovered was learning the rules of the game and learning how to play the game with more cunning than everyone else around them, and if you learn the rules of the game of your system, you will find success too.

  We read in 1 Daniel that the four got their internship in Babylon, where there was a productivity requirement. But as we’ve discussed, the position also came with a dietary requirement that went against their faith. Part of studying the game was saying, “We know we can’t eat the same way everyone else eats. Can we meet the professional requirement while still adhering to what we believe?” First, they went to their manager, who said, “Listen, boys. I wish I could help you. But heaven forbid this doesn’t work. I’m not only going to lose my job, but I’m going to be killed. So, while I’m sympathetic to your issue, my own desire for self-preservation is greater than my willingness to take a risk on you.”

  They could have walked away, defeated. But they knew one of the rules of the game, which is No isn’t always no. They went to their immediate supervisor, which is where they should have gone to begin with. He said, “I will give you ten days to do this. If it doesn’t work . . .” In today’s terminology, they would be fired, but more permanently. They were given an opportunity to meet the standard, but they bore the responsibility for it.

  It was a profound lesson. Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego got what they were looking for, but they also had to check themselves and say, “Wait a minute. Do we really want this? Because now we’re going to be held accountable for it.” They decided that owning their faith was the way for them to play the game on their own terms, so they agreed. They followed their diet for ten days and at the end of the ten days, they were smarter and more productive than the others in the internship program. So much so that when the internship came to an end, they were so successful that the king accepted them into his service and gave them permanent employment.

  KNOW THE RULES

  The Hebrew Boys understood that it didn’t matter whether they agreed with the rules of Babylon or not. If they wanted the opportunity to apply their spiritual wisdom to achieve secular success, they had to understand the rules and learn to work within them to achieve their goals. Back in Chapter One, we talked about how important it is to study the field you want to be working in. Now let’s look at why studying is so important and break down our next Commandment:

  You Have to Know the Rules to Play the Game

  I’m not diminishing the importance of any career by calling it a game. I understand that some careers—law, medicine, the military, law enforcement—are serious business, even life or death at times. But if you look closely at the path to advancement in any career, it looks a lot like a game. There are winners and losers. There’s a field of play like the board in a game. There’s strategy and traps you can fall into if you’re unwary. And there are rules—some written, but many that are unwritten—that you have to follow if you want to have a chance to compete, win, or even stay in the game.

  Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were able to apply their spiritual values to their secular environment because they learned the system. They figured out what the rules were and how those rules fit in with their ethical code, and they pushed those rules as far as they could in order to get the chance to prove that their approach not only was valid but fueled their ascent to success. You can think of the rules as organizing principles that will help you channel your energy in the right places and avoid wasting time. They’re also reminders that no matter how you think things should work in your profession or your desired line of work, that’s not how they actually do work. The rules are the ultimate reality check.

  I’m going to share some rules that will help you no matter what your talent may be. There are a few quick things you should know about the rules:

  •They don’t all carry the same weight. Depending on your field, some rules will be a lot more important than others. Know which ones they are.

  •They won’t all be perfectly suited to your personality. However, that doesn’t mean you can ignore them. It does mean that you may need to grit your teeth when playing that part of the game.

  •They may defy what you think you know. That’s what I’ve found in the entertainment world. The rules are the codes of the real world that the church is sometimes disconnected from. That doesn’t invalidate them; if anything, it makes them even more relevant, because they are critical to helping you move beyond what you think you know and help you understand what really matters.

  Okay? Let’s talk about the rules of the game.

  RULE #1: EVERYONE IS CONCERNED ABOUT SELF-PRESERVATION

  The immediate supervisor of Daniel, Shadrach
, Meshach, and Abednego was willing to go out on a limb to allow them to apply their dietary beliefs, but their main manager was not. He was more concerned with protecting his own neck than with allowing his subordinates to do something that may or may not have increased their productivity. His desire for self-preservation came before everything else. This is important to understand when you are navigating your career.

  People whom I’ve counseled about their life and careers have often missed this key rule and how to apply it to make the right moves or navigate the system they’re in. You need to learn how to think from a bird’s-eye point of view and say, “These are the issues, and these are people’s concerns. How can I alleviate somebody’s concern and still get what I’m looking for, which is opportunity?” If you go after opportunity without understanding that the people you work for have things they want, you will have a hard time getting that opportunity. Even if you do get it, you will have a political target on your back.

  Going back to the Hebrew boys, Daniel understood this rule well. When he approached his immediate superior to negotiate the opportunity to eat differently, he provided a time frame: “Try us out for ten days on a simple diet of vegetables and water. Then compare us with the young men who eat from the royal menu. Make your decision on the basis of what you see” (Daniel 1:12–13, MSG). Providing a time frame was essential to getting the “yes” because Daniel understood the needs of his supervisor and framed his request in a way that would fit with those needs.

  To become successful in life, you have to be strategic and smart. Jesus was smart. He was strategic. He was thoughtful. He spent thirty years studying the environment, the politics, the economy, the culture, of where he would work and ultimately minister. He learned everything about the game he would play, including what the other players wanted. Before he made a play for power, he made himself into a strategic warrior.

  This concern for self-preservation doesn’t have to come from a place of malice or self-centeredness. According to the Employee Well Being Study from HRO Today magazine and Yoh Recruitment Process Outsourcing, we live in a time when the potential for job promotion and raises and employee trust are at historic lows. This translates into most people (especially those in positions of power) being hypersensitive about their job security. Just like you, they have families to provide for, mortgages to pay, and car payments to make. When they are evaluating their staff and deciding whom to stand behind, this plays a huge role.

  Church doesn’t always prepare us for that reality. It’s not going to be enough just to walk onto a movie set or into advertising, law, or venture capital and say, “God’s going to work it out for me, praise the Lord.” As we’ve learned, God is actively working for us, but we must do our part and study the people we work for and with. Being aware of and sensitive to the underlying current of self-preservation can even give you an advantage over people who have more experience than you do.

  Don’t deceive yourself. There will always be some selfless people who will help you because they care. But by and large, you will be rewarded based on how you help others reach their goals. There’s another difficult truth to absorb, which is that early in your career, you might do terrific work that furthers a superior’s self-interest but receive no reward or recognition for it. That’s common, unfair, and unlikely to change. How do you avoid becoming bitter and cynical?

  First, don’t always expect recognition. Don’t assume that if you make a superior or mentor look good, it will always translate to direct recognition from them; sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn’t. However, early in my career, I learned that even if I didn’t get the reward or recognition I was looking for from my direct superior, I still was set up to succeed because this understanding was extremely useful in my subsequent jobs. Second, keep your head down and continue doing great work. Remember, praise, recognition, and fame from others isn’t your main goal; you are working as though you were working for the Lord. Eventually, you will be recognized beyond even your deepest ambitions.

  RULE #2: NO ISN’T ALWAYS NO

  It depends whom you get the “No” from. The Hebrew Boys got a “No” from their manager, but they went to their immediate supervisor, who said, “I’m going to give you ten days. And if it doesn’t work, you’re done.” Which meant they would be dead. That’s a “be careful what you wish for” scenario, isn’t it?

  Have you ever heard the saying, “No one ever got fired for saying no”? Every creative industry uses it because any creative idea—whether it’s for a movie, a book, or a piece of software—is inherently risky and hard to visualize. If you approach someone with an idea or an offer, and they can’t visualize it being successful, they’re going to say “No.” That does not necessarily mean your purpose is incorrect, your idea is a bad one, or your offer isn’t worthy of consideration. It might mean that particular person doesn’t connect with your vision or doesn’t have the vision to see the value in you or your proposal. That doesn’t translate into a definitive “No” that derails your destiny.

  Consider these superstars who heard “No” in their careers:

  •Walt Disney was fired from the Kansas City Star in 1919 because, his editor said, he “lacked imagination and had no good ideas.”

  •Elvis Presley is one of the bestselling musical artists of all time. But back in 1954, Elvis was still a nobody, and Jim Denny, manager of the Grand Ole Opry, fired him after just one performance, telling him, “You ain’t goin’ nowhere, son. You ought to go back to drivin’ a truck.”

  •Kerry Washington, before making it on Scandal, had done two pilots. Both shows got picked up, but a different actress replaced Kerry in both shows.

  •Harrison Ford, one of the leading box office superstars of all time, was told by the executives on his first film that he simply didn’t have what it takes to be a star.

  •Sidney Poitier, after his first audition, was told by the casting director, “Why don’t you stop wasting people’s time and go out and become a dishwasher or something?” Poitier vowed to show him that he could make it, going on to win an Oscar and becoming one of the most respected actors in the business.

  •Stephen King saw his first book, the iconic thriller Carrie, receive thirty rejections, finally causing him to give up and throw it in the trash. His wife, Tabitha, fished it out and encouraged him to resubmit it, and the rest is history. King is now one of the bestselling authors of all time.

  •Steve Jobs was fired from his own company. On returning, all he did was create the iPod and iPhone and lay the foundation for the world’s most valuable company.

  Some of the most influential people in every business were catapulted to success because someone told them “No.” It’s happened to me, too. Do you think every script I’ve liked and pitched has become a film or TV series? No. Do you know how many times I’ve wanted to speak somewhere and I was told “No”? I was told “No” by the USC School of Cinematic Arts. Even now, I hear “No” frequently, and sometimes, that’s a good thing. Sometimes, either your ideas (or mine) are not fully developed, the timing isn’t right, or perhaps we’re not asking for “Yes” from the right person. That’s okay. You discard what doesn’t work, learn why it didn’t work, retain that lesson, and keep going. But more important, being told “No” is the path to “Yes.” There is no one who hasn’t had doors slammed in their face—not in film, literature, art, business, sports, politics, you name it. Being denied or turned down should motivate you to keep developing and improving your script, business plan, resume, presentation, or whatever you’re using to put your best foot forward.

  My basic rule here is this:

  Don’t let the fear of a “No” frighten you away from going after “Yes.”

  Too often, we’re so afraid of hearing “No” that we don’t pursue what God has put in our heart. If God has called you to do it, then every “No” gets you that much closer to God’s “Yes.” Also, if you believe in what God has called you to do, don’t take “No” as the final answer. Revise an
d regroup, but keep pushing. Ask someone else. Ask one hundred someone elses until you get “Yes.”

  Here’s one qualifier, though: be clear about whether what you’re pursuing is His will or your will. If you keep hearing “No” again and again, start asking why. If after careful consideration and prayer, it’s revealed that what you are pursuing isn’t God’s will for you after all, accept it and move on. There’s nothing wrong with moving on to the next thing that He has planned for you.

  RULE #3: YOU WILL FIND ALLIES

  Hollywood has a reputation for being cutthroat and hyper-competitive, and to some extent that’s true. Jobs are few while the number of people who dream about working in entertainment is off the charts, so naturally, there’s a lot of competition. The same is true of any field where the rewards are substantial and the work is perceived as desirable. In this kind of environment, it can seem hard to find people who will have your back. But if you’re a person of strong values and character, you will find them.

  Your values are like magnets that attract people who will be compelled to help you because of your convictions. I found allies from the very beginning. They were USC professors who believed in me, mentors who guided me, and early bosses who gave me a chance. One of the discoveries that sustained me during the early days of trying to build a career in Hollywood was finding that, despite what many people in my church had told me about Hollywood being a place of sin and moral compromise, there were terrific people everywhere I looked. Not all of them were or are Christians. Don’t let your faith blind you to the reality that there are plenty of virtuous, moral people who have never set foot in a church (as well as some folks who might kneel every weekend in church but whom I would think twice about trusting).